· 3 min read

Relationship patterns and 50% better-performing Facebook ads

I saw this short video the other day, titled “becoming secure.”

It’s a conversation that went something like this (I’m giving it my own spin 😊):

  • “I don’t want to be with you anymore."
  • "Oh…well, that sucks. I really like you but I’ve been noticing there was something off. I understand now, that’s okay."
  • "Wait what?"
  • "Yeah, thanks. I want to be with someone who wants to be with me too. If you’re now telling me so clearly that you don’t want to be with me… I see that it’s no use trying to figure out what’s wrong between us."
  • "You’re not taking this personally?"
  • "Well, no. We all have our preferences. I’m sure there are other people who like me, and I’m sure there are others who like you. And while I think we should strive to stay together through thick and thin, there are limits to that: sometimes people just aren’t compatible, or they met each other at the wrong moments in their lives."
  • "Wow ummm is it weird that I suddenly like you again?"
  • "Haha, no. Avoidant and anxious relationship patterns tend to play into each other. But it’s a bad idea to try again—our personalities didn’t change much since the start of this conversation so we’ll just end up in the same place after a while. I want to be with another secure person, who isn’t scared of attachment but doesn’t jump into it from the first second either.”

I hope gives you a little “aha” about relationships.

But it’s also the theme of our Facebook ad conversation today.

You see—in relationships, often when one person pulls back the other clings on harder.

(PS. Contrary to the modern Western “ideal” of total independence, this is a good thing…if you’re in a generally solid relationship. Struggles are normal and it’s worth working through them. There’s a reason we evolved this stuff.)

In advertising it’s the same.

And when the game is capturing the attention span of TikTok-addicted social media users…

You’re gonna have to play that game.

So we fully embraced the sneaky game of hiding, waiting and holding back.

And it slashed my client’s cost per customer by 50% (vs. their other video ads, when the ad frequency wasn’t too high).

Now it’s my turn to stop hiding the secrets huh 😉

This ad was for a course teaching you how to start your business as a nutritionist consultant.

The premise of the video was “how much can you make as a nutritionist?”

So in the first second of the video, while the teacher is explaining, you can already see a whiteboard in the background with the actual numbers covered by post-its.

As the video continues, those post-its get removed and the answers get revealed one by one.

Now, this is pretty genius (I can say that because I didn’t come up with the idea) because:

  • The viewer immediately knows there’s something more
  • But they don’t know what’s coming
  • So all they can do is keep watching

Humans loooooove secrets.

We especially love being one of “the few who know.”

So next time you’re making an ad, or even a normal video, think about this.

How can I visually show that something extremely interesting is coming? What are the “big secrets” that I will reveal?

But in your relationships it’s usually better to handle things in a secure way.

Keep crushing it. With love.


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